Today I want to talk about how to build a badass team that can help you achieve heights you can’t alone. Maybe that sounds a little ambiguous so let me explain: anyone with a big-ass goal that they’re actively looking to achieve could benefit with a team to help them. I’m not saying you need one, but I am saying that you’ll likely see results quicker, more effectively, and have more fun along the way if you do have a team. (I have not written this post with the corporate idea of a team in mind and I’ll let you decide whether this is useful information for managers recruiting their team members in a company).
What do I mean by a team? I mean a group of individuals, selected for their unique characteristics and relationship to you that can aid you in some way. Your squad, cheerleaders, motivators, support system… call them what you will.
Before You Start
Before you start thinking about your team you need to be clear on your goal, so I’m writing this post assuming when I say goal something specific (measurable, attainable, relevant, and time-bound) pops into your head, e.g. To start a business, to win a competition, to become more confident, to get a new job, to rid the world of poverty, and anything in between.
Now, think a little about who’s already in your team. In all likelihood, you unconsciously have a team around you already helping you navigate your goal. My unofficial team currently is made up of my mum and my partner. My mum acts like a coaching ‘sponsor’ in that she’s done it before and can give me advice about how to deal with all sorts of aspects of coaching and suggests all the good books. My partner is my main source of support – from him I get unwavering dedication to believe in me whatever I choose to do and the questions every day about how I’m doing with my calls or reading or whatever it is (even if he actually has no idea what I’m talking about). The people you’re thinking about now, from your unofficial team, will play a big part in the following steps; it may just be a case of asking them officially to be on your team, or to thank them for what they are doing and continue to do.
Hold your goal firmly in your head for a few seconds until you feel that fizzy excited/nervous feeling… and let’s begin.
Break down every aspect you may want help with for your goal. Think of this slightly like a job title or role. To give an example, a professional UFC fighter may need a striking coach, jujitsu coach, dietitian, manager, mindset coach, and then coaches for specific elements such as cardio, strength, speed, and flexibility. This is one of those exercises where you need to put on an ‘ideal world’ mindset – for most of you, you’re unlikely to be able to employ a huge team to help you reach your goals (if you can then woo for you!). Instead you might find yourself writing things like ‘someone to help me stay motivated’, ‘someone to train with’, ‘someone to bounce ideas off’, etc.
This step requires you to think hard about the people in your life and to see if you know any badass individuals who can help you with any of the fields you specified in the first step. You absolutely have to keep a wide scope when doing this step. The people you list do not have to be your close friends, they don’t even have to know you yet. This is all about you realising who does what well and attributing that asset to them. A secondary action for this step is to think about why they would be good at that specific task and how well you think they would interact with you. You’ll know when you’ve finished this step as you’ll have a detailed list including: field, name, attribute, relationship (you could even make it into a table if you want to be mega fancy).
Next, we shortlist. If you’ve not worked this out yet, I’m going to make you ask some of these people to be part of your team so you may want to bear that in mind whilst shortlisting. You might not have a person for every field so yes, you may have to erase some of the roles you listed. On the other hand, you may have multiple people down for the same role. In these instances, really assess who you think you would benefit most from having in your immediate circle. If you still can’t narrow it down any further, do not stress, you can have both. You may have heard it said before that you are a reflection of the five people you interact with most. Consider who’s personality will contribute positively to your mindset and outlook, and who is likely to distract you from your purpose (hint: avoid the distracting people).
Let’s plan your approach. By now, you should have a few individuals listed who you’d love to mentor you in some aspect or another to help you reach your goal. All that’s left is to ask them. I want you to remember two things in planning your approach to each person:
1) Everyone likes to feel good at something, and;
2) No is not a reflection of your worth.
Let me give you an example. Say I established the need for a social media guru to help me gain coaching clients through social media more effectively. The prerequisite of this task is that person would need to have a successful social media account that reaches a large number of people. In approaching this person I would ensure to do the following:
- Compliment their social media content with specific examples.
- Explain your goal and that you’re hoping to find willing people to help you on your journey.
- Ask whether they would be willing to help you in some way.
The help may be short term (check out my feed and give some quick suggestions for improvements) or long term. You may ask to meet up and chat or have a call. You may even schedule a few meetups over a few months to keep you progressing. You need to assess what kind of help you want from the person and what you think they may be willing to say yes to.
Remember: no’s are not a reflection of how liked you are; they are a reflection of the individual’s time, focus, and will in conjunction to your request. Everyone is on their own journey working towards their own goals after all. If they do say no, I advise asking if they could recommend anyone else who may be able to help and if they might introduce you. It may also benefit to consider what you might have to offer in return (especially if you’re approaching someone you know from afar).
Just do it. Just ask them. Send that message or email, make that phone call, ask that person at work/the gym/that class you do. You planned it out, you’ve thought it through, now all there is to do is put yourself out there. Take a deep breath and just do it. As long as you remember that no’s aren’t personal, this shouldn’t be too scary. I believe the fear here is mainly the fear of rejection. But think of it this way, you aren’t losing anything in this process. You’ve spent time carefully considering what you need to be successful, you’ve complimented individuals on their attributes potentially strengthening relationships, and you’ve put yourself out there which will always result in:
a) increasing your confidence, and will usually either result in;
b) gaining a person who is invested in helping you achieve your goal, or;
c) gaining a recommendation or introduction to someone else.
Now You Have A Team!
Having a badass team around you that you know you can turn to for certain things will build your confidence and stability as you progress along your path. Having these conversations will allow you to ask all sorts of questions down the line that might have previously wracked you with anxiety and insecurity about boundaries. Every conversation you have about your goal is also going to strengthen your resolve and streamline your message. Most importantly, having the support of others is such a warming and comforting feeling, it is the light when everything else seems dark. You do not have to go on any journey in this world alone and there will always be somebody who says yes. There will always be people interested in what you’re doing. AND you can always, always learn from those around you.
As ever, I wish you all the best of luck with your goals! If you’re reading this and thinking you could do with a coach to help you establish goals, reach your goals, to help with confidence, mindset, fear, whatever it may be… look no further. Check out my coaching enquiries page for more information and to apply to be coached by me!